24 Hours in my day as a carer

It's 630 am and the day begins,
well I have to start this somewhere
Where does the night shift end?
Yes its not easy when someone needs your support
Like raising a child
Only this ones is my wife and it’s not her fault.

Another broken night, her condition does vary,
lost so much weight now
Very scary!

I go down to the kitchen and start things up
Empty the washer, and boil a cup
Of thickened juice, as she can’t swallow that well
Then back upstairs to help steady her progress
To bring her down, to attempt some breakfast

The nausea soon starts, a pitiful sight
Reduced to porridge, she tries with all her might.
Nebuliser given with coughs and splutters
Breathing too shallow but that doesn’t matter
"Do what you can, we will give you the kit
Try to keep her out of hospital, she will be better for it"

Breakfast done, I grab a quick shower, before a carer arrives
To give me an hour to sort the house and my youngest two
They need support to help see them through
In the moments of just  radio 2 and me
I do shed a tear, just being human, you see
Wishing things were different, why did they go wrong?
If we could answer that one this would be a different song

9am arrives the dishes are done, wife slowly comes back down
Another nebuliser is done
At least she still smiles, and we can sometimes laugh
At those silly things like the mess our country is in
Shame those food supplements come from within
The EU boarders are shut* with red tape galore
No one sees the impact it causes, but it’s only the sick
And of course there are better causes…

The morning passes and support continues
From helping with admin or planning the menu
So desperate to be “normal” you see
The homemaker for years removed unfairly

Lunch is made, we all sit down
Sandwiches, crisps, drinks for us
Thickened high calorie pudding for her
Soon the nausea starts yet again
Can’t be much fun when your tummy isn’t your friend

Conversations do vary, some would make you frown
An ASD family, there is no buffer ground
Say it as you see it, plexi glass in place
Let those comments bounce off, into someone else’s space.

The afternoon is her rest time, a couple of hours for me
To catch up with more paperwork
The NHS again you see
Yes they will fund your care to stay at home
However, they want their spreadsheets – just in case you’ve flown
Off to tropical islands or living it up
Never likely to happen – we are not the corrupt! **

4pm arrives and snacks are prepared
A mashed banana this time – how she dares!
Then preparing for dinner, Teresa is easy to do
Another bowl of porridge
However, there is me and the other two

Easier now Coeliac has been diagnosed
They are trying more foods now
Tummies less in disposed
The evening carries on, dishes are now done
Then 9pm comes along
Time for the night-time run
Nebs and meds given and in bed by 10
She is just exhausted
Time to begin again

The night shift is now upon us
Let’s see what this one brings
2am for sure – 4am a given.
My alarm goes off 630 sharp,
I sigh once again, now back to the start
A new day has begun.. which will be like above
Unless medical appointments change the routine
The things we do for love…

Richard Searson – January 2023

*     The main supplier of medical food supplements is a company called Nutricia – they are based in the Nederland’s and since Brexit it is proving very difficult to get them delivered. Fine if just a supplement, not if it is your only source of nutrition

** The PPE contracts and track and trace cost the UK a fortune of wasted funds, lining the pockets of certain people. NHS health care funding spend more time scrutinising the small funds and letting millions flood away.